Almost 12 years ago now, Adam and I were married, and this song was played at our wedding. I chose it because I was marked by the verse “break my heart for what breaks yours, everything I am for your kingdom’s cause.” That was my soul cry to the Lord. I don’t even believe I understood the gravity of that longing then, and maybe even now. I’ve had glimpses along the way, moments where the Lord has “gifted” me with the ability to feel so deeply the pain that someone else is enduring, that I questioned why I prayed that prayer. There have been times when I’ve begged God to take the burden of someone else’s pain and suffering so they could have relief. And there’s been times where I haven’t asked for it specifically but I wake in the morning with a grief so intense that I weep on behalf of someone the Lord has laid on my heart and I intercede for them. As the Lord has birthed the vision of Solomon’s Porch, I understand why that verse has been my soul’s cry. I feel deeply, I love deeply, I care for people that frankly most people don’t care about, and I love them despite receiving love in return. And that, my friends, is difficult. This morning the Lord keeps bringing to my mind Matthew 18:22: When Peter asks Jesus how many times he should forgive his brother and sister, and Jesus answers not seven times, but seventy-seven times. So hard. But a mandate. As I read my devotion this morning, I was also reminded to love above all things (1 Peter 4:8) and I think about God’s love for me. How many times has He forgiven the unthinkable in me, how many times I’ve turned my back on Him, how much I’ve hurt Him and yet he continues to forgive and show me mercy, give me grace and even favor! He LOVES me that much, above everything else. And that’s how I desire to love others, that’s why I desire to feel what He feels. EVERYTHING I am for HIS kingdom’s cause.
Comments